One of the funniest things I read last year was that Jamie Oliver, supposedly, had rung up Angelina Jolie to congratulate her on the her new movie, Beowulf. Why I don't know, her performance in the film sucked so hard I left the theatre with a hickie (I suppose you could also go with "it blew so hard I left the theatre looking like Don King", neither of which is really funny, but you know.. Whatever floats your boat.). Anyway, according to the magazine, he mistakenly called her daughter Shiloh Pitt Piloh Shit.
Epic.
Truth be told, I'm not completely convinced he did call her firstborn a heap of poo though. Let's face it, Jamie can be entertaining, but he's not THAT entertaining. Come to think of it, I can't really think of a lot of chefs who are. The one show that stands out is The F Word with Gordon Ramsey which, once every blue moon, can be downright hilarious. I've got nothing against Ramsey, but whenever I see him discussing his cuisine with a guest, it’s like watching Monty Python’s dead parrot skit.
Patron: "I would like to register a complaint."
Gordon: "Yes?"
Patron: "This bread is stale."
Gordon: "No, it’s not."
Patron: "Yes, it is."
Gordon: "No, it’s not. It’s crunchy."
Patron: "Listen mate, it’s like eating a brick."
Gordon: "No, it’s not. It’s got texture."
Patron: "It hasn’t. The holy Bible has got texture. This bread is like eating said book."
Gordon: "Yeah, I know, it’s divine."
Even Bagdad Bob would be impressed.
/JP
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