English 101

According to the current rules in Britain, migrants are required to know English.

Basically, it comes down to this: Under a "points" system, there are three main categories of immigrants coming to Britain from outside the EU to work, which are "highly skilled", "skilled" and "low-skilled" workers. The first two groups can eventually settle permanently in Britain; the third cannot. Basically, what they are saying is: "We'll take your lawyers, doctors and people who actually contribute. The poor, uneducated feckers can skive off to the US".

For some professions though, it all seems a bit redundant to me. For example, how the hell are you supposed to do well in a British court if you don't know the language? In any situation where you have to rely on language as your tool of trade, it would be an oxymoron calling you "highly skilled" if you didn't have the brains to be bothered to actually learn how to speak, read and write.

Customs officer: Alright, where you from?
Man: India.
Customs officer: Business or pleasure?
Man: I'm actually considering migrating here.
Customs officer: Really? Well, eh.. What do you work with? We've already got a ton of curry places, you know.
Man: I'm a comedian.
Customs officer: You know you have to be able to speak English, right?
Man: You know, I'm not sure my material will work here, but honestly, I doubt telling the jokes in hindi will help.

/JP